The Evils of Count Ragula

"Swirling" and "eddying" are two things that mist does rather well in vampire tales. When mist is swirling or eddying, it always seems concrete, as if you could pick it up and carry it or play with it. "That Woman" of the vampire flicks, who in the persona of my sister will be called "Mary Siss" (for the presupposed virginal state of such women), always wanders around outside the manor/castle/estate in the moonlight, eyes glazed over with desire for The Vampire and mist swirling and eddying around the hem of her night attire. Mary Siss, of course, would be wandering around in the green dress, having borrowed it from the relative who would later stake her through the heart. That would be me.

Just what would Mary Siss be doing there at all hours of the night? Trying to resist being among the living, of course. She is afraid of the living, the truly living, and prefers to retreat into a little world which she can invent as she goes along and label as "normal". This little world is ruled by The Evil Count Ragula.

In this little world, no one has to interact with a partner or sig oth on a daily basis. Each can safely retreat to his/her own coffin with the coming dawn, thus avoiding both responsibility and true intimacy. How convenient for Mary Siss and Count Ragula.

It has not always been this way for Mary Siss. Before she fell under the spell of the Evil Count Ragula, Mary Siss borrowed the green dress for happy things like dinner and dancing. Her partners may not have been permanent or even lasting, but at least they came out in the daytime! After the advent of Count Ragula, the green dress hung sadly in full view on Mary Siss' upper landing, waiting for her moment of inspiration to write about its history. Regrettably, it only got worn in the swirling mists of her mind....and that was in the dark. I rescued the green dress when I drove the stake through Mary Siss' heart (see the letter in an earlier post) and now I am the one doing the writing.

How did this happen? How did the Evil Count Ragula insinuate himself into the life of the practical and pragmatic Mary Siss the Nurse and turn her into his creature of the night? Here are some of the things I have come up with (excuse the dangling participle):

1. He is a loner, and a brooding loner at that. If Mary Siss wanted to be with him, it had to be with only him, and so he slowly excluded all others from her life. The exceptions to this would be the casual relationships that were kept around to give an appearance of normalcy ("This is my friend with whom I do a once-a-year spa weekend").

2. He is strange and not socialized. This fits right in with the exclusionary thing. Mary Siss had to keep him away from mortals like me and Sig, because too much exposure meant that we would surely see him for what he is....too late for that one!

3. He is grasping and clinging and constructs a web just like a spider. The Evil Count Ragula married Mary Siss and then cast her out, but he never did consent to a divorce. They are still "married", which means that she cannot legally be with another. This is really getting Gothic.

4. Here's the kicker. Mary Siss seems to accept this state of things and actually enjoy it! Evidence is that she has been free to go out and file for a divorce at any time and has yet to do so after more than ten years of the "arrangement". You may read this as just another excuse for her not to get on with life, and mark the page "clutching the chains that bind".

5. He is deeply involved in Orgonomy, which involvement Mary Siss can drag out at any time to prove how healthy and normal he is. Well, I, the relative with the stake, am also involved in Orgonomy, and I can tell you that I have met many very unhealthy people who are similarly involved and are attracted there for the appearance of health.

So....it looks like The Evil Count Ragula is firmly entrenched in Mary Siss' "life", and I will have to stay away from the undead for my own sanity. At least I managed to rescue the green dress. No more swirling and eddying mists. It is living in the real world once again.

Siss Gets Her Neck Bitten....But Good

So, why do I see Siss as the "Damsel in Distress" who never gets rescued (see previous post)? Well, this occurred to me even before I thought of the vampire spin on "The Green Dress Diaries". Siss is a natural damsel in distress, especially the "distress" part. Outwardly brisk and competent in her everyday persona of "Super Nurse", she is actually needy, self-serving, clinging, and quite childlike. These qualities are perfect for her to slip into the role of "that woman" in the early vampire flicks.

"That Woman" is a weak sister as far as I am concerned. She always falls prey to the Vampire's come-hither, and takes to her bed for several days of feverish muttering and declining strength. The Vampire visits her nightly to feed on both her blood and her wits, and by the end of the third night (or so), she dies, is encrypted (so to speak) and rises again as a vampire version of her former self. The downside of this is that she is always staked through the heart by well-meaning relatives who want her to "rest in peace".

Siss fell for The Wet Rag, as she fell for others before him, because she was needy of a partner. At the same time, he was needy of the look of being a normal person. Ha! I think that he always knew he was not a suitable candidate for spending life with someone else; he is too much of a brooding loner, just like a vampire. Siss was his energetic victim, and she went willingly to the slaughter, just like "That Woman". She kept coming back for more until he bled her absolutely dry and then kicked her to the curb because he "needed to be alone"...."had never loved her"...."it was not ever a marriage". Consider Siss dead and in her crypt.

Now look at what happened next. Siss rose from the crypt when he moved in next door to her, and she does his bidding, acts like his best friend, gives him the cover of normalcy, and has no other life save for The Wet Rag Vampire.

I guess this would leave me to play the well-meaning relative who stakes her through the heart so that she can rest in peace. The "stake" would be the final letter I sent (see earlier chapters). You see, just like "The Emperor's New Clothes", Siss never saw what she really looked like, didn't want to see what she really looked like, and wanted everyone else to go along with her little charade of emotional health. I forced her to look, and it was like a stake through her heart.

Will Siss rest in peace? I don't think so.
Has she seen the last of The Wet Rag Vampire? Not by a long shot.
Will she ever try to contact me again? Too late; she lives in another world now.

This is all a nice narrative, but it needs to be fleshed out with imagery, and the characters given names. Next chapter...."The Evils of Count Ragula".